Jan
10
Written by:
Blake Shipp
1/10/2011 10:04 AM
I am not a family expert, nor the son of a family expert. However, I have recently been learning something about faith and family. Not the kind of learning you get from a book. The kind of learning you get from living, the raw, gritty school of trying and failing, trying and succeeding. When Rachel and I first began our journey as parents, we expressed a commitment that more than anything we wanted to hand off our faith to our kids. We could fail in any area except this one. I don't mean, we could make our kids believe, but we had the sincere desire to do everything possible to ensure that our kids grew up in an environment that nurtured a faith relationship with Jesus. It didn't take long before we realized we had no idea of how to do it.
Neither one of us grew up in a home where faith was part of the normal environment. That's a strange statement for me to make as both of us grew up in the church. Really, faith wasn't part of our home life. Faith was reserved for church life, the hours of nine to noon on Sunday mornings. When we got home, we didn't speak again of God or faith until Sunday rolled around again. It was assumed that we got all we needed in the faith-nurturing department from our Sunday School teachers and the pastor on Sundays to last us until the next Sunday. Sometimes I marvel at this approach and that both of us ever got it at all. Growing up in this way, we decided we would be different. But how?
My early attempts were met with little success. I quickly found that theological discussions with 2 year-old children usually devolve into a situation in which I am left sitting on the couch and my toddler is wandering into another room to find something and someone more interesting than Dad at the moment. They just don't want to hear about such things as redemption, justification, or even the difference between transsubstantiation or consubstantiation.
One day I was reading in Deuteronomy and came to the sixth chapter. There, Moses gave instructions to parents in which he simply said, make faith and God a part of your normal life. Talk about God in the normal activities of your day. So we started doing just that. The first step was to make Bible reading part of our normal evening story time. We bought a Bible that the kids understood and found interesting and began to read one story a night. Next came evening prayers, and then a blessing that we say every night over the kids (Num. 6.24-26). Next came pointing out aspects of nature. Drives to preschool became moments to talk about clouds, birds, trees, and sunrises and how God has created a world of beauty. More recently, Sundays have become a time where we worship together rather than separating into different parts of the building. Saturdays have become Sabbath days, days in which we talk about how God wants us to rest and enjoy Him and one another. Most recently, we purchased a prayer book and have begun to observe the Office of the Hours with short prayers appropriate for children. I have wondered for some time. Is it enough? Are our kids going to get it? We aren't doing any of the normal stuff. We aren't handing off our kids to anyone else but we are taking total responsibility here. What if we fail? I wondered until yesterday.
Yesterday while Rachel was resting, Hayden crawled up next to her and asked, "How does God get inside you? Do you have to eat Him?" They had a theological conversation about how God dwells inside people, a conversation stirred up by Hayden watching communion just one Sunday ago. Mind you, he is three. Then later in the day, while Hayden was getting a bath, we heard Addison talking in another room. Rachel peeked in and found her on her knees talking. When asked, she said she was talking to God, thanking Him for making such a beautiful world because Pastor Rob said God made everything. We have never taught her to get on her knees and pray, and yet she felt the need to do just that, to offer her heart-felt thanks to her creator God. Mind you, she is just four and she understood the central part of yesterday's sermon.
Yesterday was a great day for us as parents, not because we are parents of the year, but because we saw God's faithfulness. We discovered a powerful truth, one that really isn't rocket science. When parents intentionally work faith into their daily routine, kids pick it up. God starts moving. Little hearts start beating, beating with a love for the God that has loved them since the beginning of time.
A fellow traveler,
Blake
Spiritual Formation Pastor
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4 comment(s) so far...
Re: Faith and Family
Blake,
This is very cool on a number of fronts. On one level just a great moment for Addison and for you guys as parents. A story you could tell at her wedding. But it also says something pretty important about family worship. When we say kids (be they preschool or teens) don't understand the sermon what I think we usually mean is they don't get what we get. That is likely true. Maybe always true. BUT it doesn't mean they don't get anything. Maybe they get what they need to get at that stage in their development. Maybe the Spirit of God gives them what they need just as he does to us. This has real implications for ministry and how we see services--especially it seems to me for youth.
By rob cattalani on
1/10/2011 11:56 PM
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Re: Faith and Family
Blake, I am so glad you shared this precious story with us. I think what you are doing with your children is all about what Deuteromony 6:4-9 says. Here is it in "my" version:
Love the Lord God with all your heart and soak in his instructions. The more we absorb them, the more they will fill us up to overflowing so that all we want to do is share them! And the first place to share them is with our children. Everyday, in all the normal things in life. Talk about God's instructions when you are at home trying to settle a sibling dipute. Talk about God's instructions when you are out in the car, driving around, watching how people interact with each other and spend their time and money. Talk about God's instructions and thank the Lord for all his provisions and blessings when you are putting your kids to bed. Talk about them when they are getting up and facing the new day and asking God to be present in all they do and all the decisions they make.
Passing on our faith to our children is not about bringing them to church or Kidz Powered UP or Clubs or Music Makers, or even CBS, it's about how we LIVE our faith and how we talk about faith. Moms and Dads will always be the primary spiritual influence in a child's life, no matter how many programs a child attends. Let's not miss the opportunities the Lord provides when we sit at home, when we walk along the road, when we lie down and when we get up.
By Laura Mathias on
1/12/2011 11:30 AM
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Re: Faith and Family
Hi Blake,
Thank you for sharing the personal interactions of your sweet family. You (and Rachel) are inspirational disciples who walk daily (moment by moment) with God. Blake, thank you for all that you do at BCC -- I am always encouraged, inspired and oftentimes challenged by your Godly wisdom which you share so freely. I am praying Deuteronomy 28:1-14 over your family...many blessings to you and your family.
By Pam on
1/13/2011 12:24 AM
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Re: Faith and Family
Dear Blake,
Thanks for your sound practical guidance. I struggle with many of the same things day to day. It was comforting and helpful to me to read your story. Thanks for sharing.
By Ron Dafoe on
1/14/2011 7:47 AM
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