Re: I am who I am. . .

Blake, as I think back on my life I come up with a list of names that significantly helped shape my person and path. Early on they were not in my control--key members of my family, coaches and teachers--but as I got older I had more of a hand picking those people. There are some periods I wished I'd made better choices but beginning with my college years many I can look back on with tremendous gratitude. I know for sure I would not be who and where I am without them. What fascinates me further is how this process has not stopped. I am still, in middle age, in formation and I continue to be shaped in small ways and in large ones by others I meet and know. I think this is something that may be lost on some of us--we assume we are formed by a point in our lives but this is not so. I think God puts people before us who hold the power to further shape us if we are open to inviting them in. This is why our walk with God which fosters humility and teachability is so important. Central to being a disciple is that we remain teachable. I also think most of us (I know this is true for me) underestimate our ability to play that role in the life of others. Not only in formal relationships (our children or intentional one on one relationships) but in informal ones, our neighbors, friends, co-workers, even family members. I think a church can help assist these kind of relationships, encourage them, but they need to become a priority and a value and when they do I think we will all be surprised at the size of our own influence.

Re: I am who I am. . .

Hey Blake, after reading your blog I was going to make the comment you made in your second post. Letting people be a part of our lives not only influences them, but us as well, just as iron sharpens iron. I've also found that this can work negatively as well. If I'm letting people influence me who make poor decisions, I too will eventually struggle more with making the wise decisions. In proverbs it says "without counsel purposes are disappointed: but in the multitude of counselors they are established." If that's the case, it's so important to be aware of the people we let counsel us.

I also like Rob's comment about remaining teachable. I read an article about an 80-year-old man giving his secrets to success and he said "Never stop learning. The day you stop learning is the day you start decaying."

An additional comment I had when reading your post Blake, was how sometimes I'll look around at people who are looking up to me and think "what can I do for them to help them become the best people they can be? I don't want to let them down. What can I do?" And I would stress myself out trying to think of the best things to do to and for people to love on them. Eventually I just stopped and thought, "Hey, I turned out pretty well. I mean, a few thousand more things to correct before perfection, but I'm doing ok." and then I asked to question "What did my parents and friends do for me to help make me this person?" And it wasn't the once in a great while humongous things that did the most (although, trips to Disneyworld and birthday parties at Chuck E. Cheese's were awwwwwesome!) the key factor that all the influential people in my life showed was: consistent love. And I don't know about you, but for me, that's a bigger challenge than anything else I could do for someone.

So I will start this week looking for ways to consistently show love to those in my life. And the greatest thing is, Jesus realized the importance of this (john 13:34-35). And I think because it's so important, that it's something we need to constantly learn to become better in. And the first step is by inviting people into my life to share this love with.

Peace and love!

~JAYCE

Re: I am who I am. . .

I'm enjoying everyone's comments on reflecting on the investment people have made in your own lives and choosing to invest in the lives of others.

One thing that got me thinking as I read through these posts was Rob's comment on how the older we get, we may have more of an opportunity to "handpick" our mentors/influencers.
I want to pose an alternative thought: Do we have the opportunity to "handpick" our mentees, the people we want to invest in?

As I think about this for myself, I think the answer is both Yes and No.

Yes, I have the choice of who I want to spend time with and who I want to pour myself into. I can look for someone who has a lot in common with me, or someone I think has a lot of potential, or someone who is ready to grow and learn, or someone who really needs love, or someone I can walk beside when things are tough.

However, I might answer No to the question, because all too often I think those people find me... even when I least expect it. It might be a secretary at work, or someone from my community group, or a friend of a friend. Common code words for potential mentee: 'We should get coffee sometime' or 'We should hang out more' or something along those lines. The offer is being extended. It's my job to follow through on an opportunity to be intentional and share time with this person. Sometimes just listening or making myself available, even with a hectic schedule, can mean so much to someone.

Choosing to share life with someone else in a real and genuine way, whether you find them or they seek you out, is what investing in others is all about.

Re: I am who I am. . .

Abbie, I would agree it is yes and no. I think the older we get--in our walk--the more we can discriminate and move toward people to invest in or learn from. At the same time I think too some of my best relational rub, so to speak, has come from people God and or circumstance has put in my path--for long periods or very short ones.