Last week I wrote about coming to a point in our lives that we experience a loving relationship with God. As I have chewed on that thought myself, I have wondered. Do I really believe that God loves me? Better yet, do I believe that God is love? I am not talking about what I say I believe, but what I really believe, that which is demonstrated in my actions. For me, it is an important question. If I am to be loved by God and love Him in return then He needs to be loving in His character. So is He?
When I look beyond what I say to what I do, God looks to be anything but loving. As I interact with others, I am more convinced that the same can be said of most people’s God. The God most of us serve can be petty and concerned more with performance than the person. He can be easily frustrated. He has to get His way and can run over you if you get in His way. He likes to bark orders, and His tone of voice can be angry. This is not to say that He can’t be gentle and kind. He does smile, we just have to be good. If we aren’t good, then. . .well. . .the result is God is quite disappointed.
I catch myself serving this God some days. I recognize it when I am scurrying around trying to accomplish something “for God.” I feel it when my kids keep me from a planned time of devotion and guilt sets in, that feeling that I have somehow let God down. I project it when I hold others to standards to which I would never wish God to hold me. My God isn’t always loving.
Here’s the good news. My God—the one I have in my mind—isn’t real. The real God is always loving. He understands life with kids and welcomes interruptions. He is infinitely patient. He recognizes that I am fragile and frail. He doesn’t want me to earn anything as He has done everything. All He wants is me to look upon Him and receive His love. The trouble is that the real God can be supplanted by my image of God. That ever happen to you? So how can we allow the real God to step forward? I think it starts by working to re-write the deep narratives we hold about who God truly is. This is a deep work that doesn’t happen overnight, but it can happen. How? It can happen in two simple steps. First, we can saturate our lives with God’s Word. I recommend memorizing 1 Corinthians 13.1-8 and meditating on Psalm 139 for a start. Sit and soak with these words of God’s love allowing them to change how you think about God. Secondly, we can come to know who God is by experience. Rather than living by a projected image of who we think God is, we can daily engage with God. As we engage with God through things such as prayer, community, and especially silence, we can learn by experience that God is much different than we have imagined.
So what step will you take this week? How will you open your life to the God who loves you?
A fellow traveler,
Blake
Spiritual Formation Pastor